CHICAGO, IL – Investigators
have confirmed that the tragic events that happened yesterday, killing dozens of people and injuring 100's of others, were not due to terrorism, thank God.
Immediately following the terrible incident, many eyewitnesses and bystanders
couldn't help but think that terrorism was at play. “Well there were
explosions, and screaming, and people running,” survivor Jeremy Meiffren
recounted, “you couldn't help but think that some terrorist planned it all.”
However, reports have definitely ruled out any malicious acts of terror, leaving
human error and terrible, awful luck as the only suspects. “When catastrophic
events are planned by some religious radicals, especially the ones who kill
themselves in the process, you’re usually left with this horrible, empty cocktail
of anger and disbelief and resentment,” explained therapist Dr. Kelly Franklin.
“But in this case, at least we can find some construction worker or CEO to lay
the blame on. Or, we can accept it, blame it on God, and say it all happened
for a reason.” Nonetheless, a gang of domestic terrorists released a video on
YouTube saying that they did not plan or implement this heartbreaking episode but
they do wish they thought of it first.
An act of God, thank God |
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